As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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