C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
