I'd wear matching sweaters with you
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Randomize
