WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
