i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
