no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
