I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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