is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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