oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
