Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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