Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
my poor anus
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
