if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize