Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
