Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Randomize
