Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize