Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
