I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Randomize
