U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
