how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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