yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
