i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
