Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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