i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
