He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I would ride that face into the sunset
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
