that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
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shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
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Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message