I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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