i permit you to call me
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
