we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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