its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
