I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
