Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
