Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
