Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
