There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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