is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
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Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
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I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize