We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
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Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
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He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
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