I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
