it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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