So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He better not be in your backpack
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
