he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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