WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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