i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
