The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
