so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
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Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
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Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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