my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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