dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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