do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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