Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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