my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
