Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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